Dead Water Will "Change Your Life for the Better"

This morning my Google Mention led me to a website that gave away pirated e-books, including my novella Dead Water. At first I was considering going all Rick Grimes on their asses, until I read the blurb from Brimidam: "Don't be afraid to change your life for better [sic]. This book will help you."

What better praise can a writer get? When was the last time a horror writer was told their book could change people's lives? If Oprah still had her book club, I'd be pitching her producers to put me on the show an share my inspiration with the world.

So what are you waiting for? Improve your lives starting NOW! Learn the skills needed to survive a zombie apocalypse. Acquire the knowledge to handle hordes of the living dead aboard an oil rig out at sea. Develop the leadership skills to handle those the-world-has-gone-to-hell situations. Learn to write a proper sentence. You owe it to yourself to change your life and be the very best you can be. And all for only $1.99 on Amazon.

After all, if you can't trust a website that pirates e-books, who can you trust?

[EDITOR'S NOTE: This is not an April Fool's joke, although I am putting a humorous spin on the entire incident.]